Two recurring thoughts today, April 16, 2013

VT Memorial 21. When I was a freshman in college, I skipped class for all kinds of reasons: rain, sun, cramps. Bad hair day. Good hair day. Interesting lunch conversation. Particularly compelling episode of Guiding Light. Cute squirrels on campus. Etc. If two people had been shot and killed in my dorm, I certainly would have taken the rest of the day off. Probably the rest of the week. She didn’t. She called her mom, assured her that everything was OK, and rushed across the Drillfield to her French class.

2. Fall semester 2006, second day of classes, first day of freshman English. McBryde Hall. We push the desks in a circle. My students—17 and 18-year-olds—are visibly shaken. The day before, campus had been locked down. An inmate had escaped custody, killed a security guard, and then killed a police officer on a trail near the athletic fields. One student begins talking about armed police officers running into his lecture hall. Another says her mom wants her to come home. The floodgate opens. They’re scared. Nothing like this has happened to them before. Everything will be OK, I tell them.

A month or so later, ten little girls are shot at an Amish elementary school in Pennsylvania. We talk about it in class. Who shoots little kids? someone asks. We throw up our hands and shake our heads. The world is messed up. Some messed up people out there. We talk about school shootings, our violent culture. Then we move on to logical fallacies, conventions of academic writing, an upcoming Hokie football game.

I think I will leave what happens next unwritten. I keep typing and deleting. Starting over and deleting again. It’s too sad, and everyone knows the story anyway, and everything won’t be OK, not really, maybe not ever. We’re still shooting each other in school. And now we’re blowing each other up on the streets. And we can’t agree about how to fix things, but it has to start with love, doesn’t it?

Love: the peach tree in my yard is blooming. My baby girl can pull herself up to standing. She says Mamamamamama. So, there’s that. And birdsong.

Three Spring Birding Festivals

Blue-headed vireo at last year's New River Birding and Nature Festival

Blue-headed vireo at last year’s New River Birding and Nature Festival

If you’re looking for a birdy vacation this spring, I’ve got three suggestions for you—the New River Birding and Nature Festival in Fayetteville, WV, the Cape MAYgration Shorebird and Horseshoe Crab Festival in Cape May, NJ, and the Canaan Valley Birding Festival in Davis, WV. All three offer bird walks with knowledgeable local guides as well as an array of speakers and presentations. I hope you’ll check one or more of them out. Pre-registration information and thorough descriptions can be found on the festival websites, but here’s a bit about each…

New River Birding and Nature Festival, April 28-May 4, Fayetteville, WV

I attended this festival for the first time last year, and I had a great time! I gave a presentation about cerulean warblers and served as a guide for a few bird walks. This year, I’ll again be leading a few walks as well as giving a presentation on Wednesday evening. Last year, everything I attended at this festival was excellent—the evening presentations, the afternoon (aka “popcorn”) presentations, the walks, the food, the location, the attendees, the organizers, my fellow guides, and of course the birds. I observed one of the highlights of my birding life on Cotton Hill Mountain during the festival—copulating cerulean warblers! I also saw a Swainson’s warbler, a life bird for me, and made quite a few friends. And, in my opinion, southern West Virginia is perhaps the most beautiful place on earth. At the time of this posting, it sounds like there are still some spots lefts. Check out the festival website for more information.

Cay MAYgration Shorebird and Horseshoe Crab Festival, May 16-19, Cape May, NJ

I visited Cape May several times during high school, but I’m ashamed to say that I’ve never been there to watch birds—I’m glad I’ll finally get the chance this spring. This festival sounds amazing. I’m looking forward to learning more about identifying shorebirds (I need practice!) Also, my first childhood memory of the ocean involves horseshoe crabs–I’m not sure where my parents took us, but I remember grabbing horseshoe crabs by their strange tails and dragging them around the beach. I can’t wait to introduce my baby daughter, Laurel, to the ocean and to these ancient creatures. In addition to many field trips and presentations, the festival features birding by boat, photography workshops, bird banding demos, and much more, including my cerulean warbler program on Saturday afternoon. One of the festival organizers is author and legendary bird guy Pete Dunne. If you don’t know his work, check him out. And check out the festival’s website.

Canaan Valley Birding Festival, May 30-June 2, Davis, WV

I’ve heard a lot of good things about this festival, and I’m extremely honored to be giving one of the keynote presentations on Saturday evening, June 1. The festival itinerary includes guided hikes for birders of all skill levels, butterfly walks, presentations, and more. If you haven’t been to the Davis, WV, area, you’ve been missing out. In addition to Canaan Valley Resort State Park, there’s Blackwater Falls State Park, Canaan Valley National Wildlife Refuge, canopy tours, rafting, caverns, restaurants, microbreweries, shops, and music. And you’re close to some of the best backpacking spots in the Monongahela National Forest.

Wow, I’m really looking forward to all three of these festivals. Can’t wait! Also, our non-profit organization, the Avian Conservation Center of Appalachia, is holding the 2nd Annual Morgantown Migratory Bird Day on May 4th at Cooper’s Rock State Forest—look for more information about that event in a future post…

AWP: Lactation and Inspiration

Every time I get on an airplane I’m certain it’s going to crash, and I’m going to die. I plan accordingly. Last week, before I left for the airport for my trip to Boston and the AWP conference, I told Jesse where to find my flash drive of unpublished material and the notebook of letters I’ve been writing to Laurel. I said my good-byes and gave my final hugs and kisses.

I sat near my departure gate at the Pittsburgh International Airport and listened to the flight crew, sitting behind me, discussing their surprise that our flight hadn’t been canceled. One read aloud from a print out: “Winds 45-50 knots, blowing snow and almost no visibility.” “Wow,” said another, “they canceled us yesterday for less than that.” I sent a panic-text to Jesse, obsessively read the alerts posted by Weather Bug, and spammed Facebook with my weather-related flight anxieties.

I thought of Laurel growing up as the kid whose mom died in a plane crash. I thought of her growing up without a mom at all. I wondered if Jesse would marry someone else after I was dead. How long would he wait? Would Laurel call his new wife “Mom”? As the plane rolled along the runway to prepare for takeoff, I wanted out. I thought of standing up and screaming, “Let me out! Let me out! Bomb! Bomb!” But then Laurel would grow up as the daughter of the crazy lady who’d been hauled away by federal air marshals.

We took off. The flight was uneventful. But I imagined that at any moment the engines would fail, and we’d plunge to our deaths. I imagined what those last moments of life would feel like. Would I sob? Pee myself? I’d been listening to Macklemore’s “Thrift Shop” on my iPod. Was that really an appropriate final song to hear before dying? I switched to my “relaxing” playlist and listened to Sarah McLachlan and Gillian Welch instead.

Of course, we landed safely in Boston, and before long I picked up my registration badge and materials at the conference and did a quick stroll through the bookfair. Milling grad students, baby-wearing poets, a few service dogs, lots of black clothing, free pens and bookmarks and those little spiral notebooks from The Missouri Review. Ahh.

I love AWP; I haven’t missed an AWP since I attended my first one in Baltimore in 2002 or 2003. The conference has grown significantly since then, but I love it for the same reasons I loved it then—it feels like a reunion, a gathering of friends, of former and current students, of colleagues, of writers famous and not. I also love the fact that attendees often pretend not to love it, as if enjoying something like an academic conference will make them less hipster and more schoolteacher.

So, a quick AWP 2013 recap…

I shortened my conference this year, arriving Thursday late afternoon and leaving Saturday early afternoon, because wee Laurel is only six-months old. Jesse does a fine job caring for her, but he doesn’t lactate, which makes his job more challenging. Lactation made AWP challenging for me, too; every three hours or so I had to scoot back to my hotel room across the (snowy, slush-filled) street for an intimate encounter with my breast pump. My friend and roomie Heather Frese Sanchez saw my boobs very, very often; she’s expecting a baby herself, though, so I don’t think she was too fazed by the whole ordeal. Our room had a fridge so I saved my milk, checked it with my luggage, and brought it all home with me. It took a lot of effort to make that stuff, and dumping it out would have been tragic. So now I have quite a stash for the next time I travel. I also limited my alcohol consumption (alas), and I tried to wait at least an hour after drinking and before pumping, but just in case, some of the milk baggies have labels like, “two glasses of wine” and “one IPA.”

My curbed alcohol consumption resulted in lonely (though clear-headed) morning strolls through the bookfair, where I exercised free-pen restraint and selected only the most interesting and unusual bits of swag.

Speaking of alcohol, there was a bar in the bookfair. Yes, a bar. What a great idea! AWP combined two of my favorite conference activities. A small cafeteria-style restaurant was next to the bar, too; if you didn’t try their French fries, you missed out. Crispy fries, cool IPA, books everywhere, and great conversation—I hope AWP makes the bookfair bar a permanent conference fixture.

Most of my time in the bookfair bar was spent with my friend and rockstar nature writer David Gessner. David is one of my favorite people, and I hope that everyone reading this already knows his work, but if not, check him out. His most recent book, The Tarball Chronicles, investigates the Deepwater Horizon oil spill. Other titles include My Green Manifesto, Sick of Nature, Return of the Osprey, and Soaring with Fidel. I recommend them all! I also recommend that you check out his blog, Bill and Dave’s Cocktail Hour.

I also had a beer with my friend and fellow hotshot Wayne Thomas (aka the Wayne Train). Wayne, another one of my favorite people, edits The Tusculum Review, one of my favorite journals. TTR reads submissions year round, hint, hint. Unfortunately, the other hotshots, Steve O., Stalker, and The Haas, couldn’t make it to AWP this year. My loves Aileen and Robin and Jeff from Virginia Tech also didn’t make it. And I somehow missed seeing several friends who were in Boston—Mary Ann, Sarah E., Gail, and others. Maybe we’ll see each other in Seattle…

On Friday morning I spent an hour signing copies of my book at West Virginia University’s bookfair table. I think I sold five books total, including one to a former student and two to friends. Not a lot, but that’s five books I wouldn’t have sold otherwise, right? WVU’s MFA students have just launched an online journal, the Cheat River Review. They’re now accepting submissions for the first issue (again, hint…). My friend and mentor Kevin Oderman signed copies of his new novel, White Vespa, at the Etruscan Press table. Do you know Kevin’s work? You should! Several other writers from WVU signed books, too; for more info on our talented faculty, check this out.

Shamefully, I only attended one panel this year, on Saturday morning. The panel, which discussed the many obstacles facing moms who write and teach, featured my friend Erika Meitner and four other brave women. In addition to delving into the serious and often heartbreaking challenges that moms working in the academy face, two of the panelists mentioned unfortunate times when they’d leaked breast milk in public. This acted as some kind of cue for my own boobs. I hustled back across the street as soon as the panel ended. I encourage you to read Erika’s poetry—her recent books include Makeshift Instructions for Vigilant Girls and Ideal Cities.

I also ran into my friend from high school (yes, high school!) Anne Hays. It’s kind of unbelievable that our small, rural high school class of 130 or so contained two women who would eventually be creative nonfiction MFAs. Anne’s got a journal, too – check out Storyscape.

So, AWP is wonderful for all kinds of reasons—in addition to getting to hang out with old friends and make new ones, I always come home inspired to write. And lately I’ve been lacking inspiration. Well, that’s not true. I have plenty of inspiration, but finding the ways and means to put words on the page has been difficult. It’s my fault, of course. I may try to blame it on wee Laurel, but in reality, I have to work harder on making time to write. I must finish that vulture book!

And this is the last mention of lactation, I promise—I’ve written this entire blog post with Laurel on my lap, alternatively napping and nursing. So it can be done! Onward, words…

Eleven Weeks of Laurel (and Just a Bit of Politics)

Laurel Joanna Fallon

As many of you know, on Monday, August 20, at 10:51pm, my daughter Laurel Joanna Fallon entered the world. I’ll spare you the details of her delivery; the short version is that it was “natural”—drug-free without intervention or complications. The midwife let Jesse catch the baby, who was born clutching the umbilical cord in her little hand. We didn’t decide on a name until the representative from vital records was literally at the door; she’s “Laurel” after Kalmia latifolia, one of our favorite native Appalachian flowers, and “Joanna” for my grandfather Joe Hosey and Jesse’s grandmother Anna Jarrett.

Mr. Bones and his baby

In two and a half months Laurel’s already changed a lot. We’re pretty sure she’s the cutest and sweetest baby ever. She smiles, coos, and even giggles, and she’s beginning to grab things with her little hands. She’s grown from 6 pounds, 5 ounces at birth to 10 pounds, 10 ounces yesterday at her doctor appointment. She likes to “talk” to the owls hanging on the wall next to her changing table, and she smiles at and reaches for her doggies. Old Mr. Bones is pretty sure that Laurel is his baby; he often checks on her, and if I’m in her room nursing her, he comes in and sits by us. Liza Jane is a bit more wary—she tries to play with Laurel, but since Laurel doesn’t run or drop food Liza loses interest. We think that once Laurel is mobile they’ll be best friends.

Pregnant lady wrestles vulture

I know she won’t remember them, but Laurel’s already had several adventures. Her first holiday was International Vulture Awareness Day. In honor of IVAD, we released a rehabilitated turkey vulture at Cooper’s Rock State Forest, and Laurel’s picture made the front page of the newspaper. (She was wearing her “I Love Vultures” onesie.) She doesn’t know it, but when Laurel was still in-utero she helped me rescue that same vulture – the bird had been caught in an illegal leg-hold trap, and we (along with other ACCA volunteers) got it out and nursed it back to health. Laurel has also “helped” rescue an injured red-tailed hawk and an Eastern screech-owl, and she’s had several “conversations” with our non-releasable barn owl. Laurel’s hiked all the way to the Raven Rock overlook at Cooper’s Rock, and she’s visited the West Virginia Botanic Garden and taken many walks at the Cheat Lake Trail. She went birding with me during the fallout from Hurricane Sandy last week, where she added ruddy ducks, surf scoters, and horned grebes to her life list.

And yesterday she voted in her first presidential election. Sure, I may have been the one who actually pushed the buttons, but I did it with Laurel’s future in mind. I want her to grow up on a healthy planet, where threats like global climate change are taken seriously, where scientific findings are respected, and where industries change their behaviors in accordance with those scientific findings. I want her to have access to excellent public education. I want her to have the freedom to choose (or to not choose) a religious affiliation, and I don’t want her to face prejudice for that choice. I want her to have equal pay for equal work. I want her to be able to make her own reproductive choices. And I want her to be able to fall in love and have the freedom to marry whomever she chooses. While I know that the folks I voted for won’t be able to deliver all of those things, I voted for the people I believe are more likely to try.

A final thought: Around election time politicians always ask, “Are you better off than you were four years ago?” and “Are we headed in the right direction?” I’ve thought about it, and yes, I think I am, and I think we are. In the last four years we bought a house, sold a house, and bought another house without any problems. Jesse graduated and had no trouble finding a job (in fact, he found too many jobs). My book was published, and I’m pleased with the way it’s been received. I’ve given talks and readings from northern Pennsylvania to eastern Tennessee and dozens of places in between. Jesse and I helped start a nonprofit organization that’s been successful so far. And we had a baby. Would I like to have a tenure-track job at a major university? You bet I would! But I haven’t applied for any tenure-track jobs yet, so that doesn’t really count. Of course, I miss my friends, colleagues, and students at Virginia Tech (were I was living and working four years ago), and it would be nice if I could somehow live in both Morgantown and Blacksburg, but overall, things are going well. I know not everyone has had such good fortune; I’m very grateful for everything, and I hope the good stuff keeps coming. And I wish good stuff for you, too, no matter your political affiliation. Thanks for reading!

At the Raven Rock overlook

A Very Birdy 2012

This year has been filled with bird and nature adventures—trips, festivals, talks, and a nonstop flood of injured birds admitted to our new nonprofit, the Avian Conservation Center of Appalachia. We’ve treated everything from Bald Eagles to Ruby-throated Hummingbirds, and recently we received our federal permit to keep non-releasable raptors for educational purposes, including this charming little Barn Owl. She fell more than thirty feet from her nest and suffered very serious (life-threatening) injuries. But she survived, and we get to keep her. We’re also launching our first citizen-science research project, an American Kestrel nest box program. (If you’re interested in participating or learning more, visit this link.) The ACCA has taken flight (haha) faster than we anticipated, and we couldn’t be more pleased. And through the ACCA I’ve made many new friends who share my passion for bird conservation.

I’ve also had the pleasure of meeting some wonderful folks at birding events, festivals, and meetings. And I have my little blue pal the Cerulean Warbler to thank for it. That little bird has a lot of fans, and I feel like I’ve been riding his coattails (tail feathers?)

At the risk of leaving something important off the list, I want to briefly mention some of the birdy highlights of the year so far:

Gettysburg Vulture Search – The day after I gave a cerulean presentation at Harrisburg’s lovely Wildwood Park in early February, I drove out to the Gettysburg Battlefield to look for the famous vulture roost on Big Round Top. I didn’t find a significant roost, but I did hike to the top of the totally deserted Big Round Top through lightly falling snow. I climbed around the rocks a bit before deciding that such a thing was probably contraindicated for someone only 10 or 11 weeks pregnant. Later, at the gift shop, I bought an extremely gruesome book about the aftermath of the famous Civil War battle. Although it sounds like the popular legend about the vulture roost’s origins (that the birds began gathering there after the battle because of the thousands of rotting human and horse carcasses) has been mostly disproven, I think it will make it into my vulture book (which I’m still working on…)

Buzzard Day, Hinckley, OH – The Sunday after St. Patrick’s Day is the annual Return of the Buzzards Festival in Hinckley, OH. In addition to high-floating Turkey Vultures fresh from migration, the festival features a pancake breakfast, tons of vulture arts and crafts, people in vulture costumes, and more. You should check it out.

Smithsonian Conservation Biology Institute Tour – Before a cerulean presentation sponsored by the Friends of the National Zoo, Jesse and I were treated to a tour of the SCBI in Front Royal, VA. This is the place where critically endangered species such as the Black-footed Ferret, Micronesian Kingfisher, and Przewalski Horse are bred as part of global species survival programs. I met a baby Kiwi, several cranes, and a very friendly Mariana Crow. And some great people, too, of course. 

Tusculum College Old Oak Festival – I got to hug the oldest oak tree in Tennessee! And hang out with hotshot Wayne and the
lovely Heather and Desi.

Copulating Ceruleans and New Friends at the New River Birding & Nature Festival – I love laughter, meeting new people, and birding. And I love to see warblers copulating. I was able to do all of these things at the New River Birding and Nature Festival in Fayetteville, WV, this spring. Check out their website (http://www.birding-wv.com/) for information about upcoming festivals. You will not be disappointed! In addition to seeing intimate cerulean lovemaking, we also spotted Swaison’s Warblers, Kentucky Warblers, Worm-eating Warblers, and just about every other warbler found in West Virginia. My fellow guides and festival attendees were a blast to hang out with. I’m looking forward to birding-by-hot tub and birding-by-beer next spring. (Both beer and hot tubs are, of course, contraindicated for pregnant people. Sigh.)

Morgantown Migratory Bird Day – The ACCA’s kickoff event, our version of International Migratory Bird Day, was held in early May at Cooper’s Rock State Forest. Early morning bird walks, a live raptor presentation, owl pellet dissection, kids’ activities, and the release of a rehabilitated Red-tailed Hawk made for a fun, family-friendly event. We’ll be announcing the date of next year’s MMBD soon, but it will most likely be the first Saturday in May 2013. Ya’all come.

Asheville, Waterfalls, and the Blue Ridge Parkway – Jesse and I, along with Mr. Bones and Liza Jane, turned a cerulean presentation into a mini-vacation in May. We rented a little cabin outside Asheville and explored Dupont State Forest, Pisgah National Forest, and a few sections of the Blue Ridge Parkway. If you want to see breathtaking waterfalls (including several that were featured in the recent Hunger Games movie), you should think about a trip to the Asheville area. Also, ceruleans nest along the Parkway near Asheville—a new friend and excellent birder took us to see a female cerulean incubating eggs right above the Parkway. Always a treat! Flame azalea and mountain laurel were in full bloom, and Jesse saved several suicidal box turtles from certain death.

Vulture Wrestling – In June, two other ACCA volunteers and myself drove down to Clay County, WV, to rescue a Turkey Vulture that had been caught in an illegally set leg-hold trap. The dehydrated, emaciated bird had been dragging the rusty trap around for at least three days. I scooped him up, Crissa freed him from the trap, and Walker filmed the whole ordeal. The poor vulture was being eaten alive by maggots, and it seemed like he might die in the car on the way back to the ACCA. But he survived, and after several surgeries, he’s going to get to keep his toe. And he should be ready for release in a matter of days. I love a good vulture success story.

US Botanic Garden – I gave a cerulean presentation here,  in the shadow of the US Capitol building. Very cool. Intimidating. They gave me a special parking permit that allowed me to park right in front of the Capitol. I wonder if members of Congress park in the same lot. Probably not, but it’s still fun to think about…

Fernow Experimental Forest – This summer I taught a wonderful creative writing class at WVU, “Writing Appalachian Ecology.” Co-taught by a professor from the Biology Department, students learned about watersheds, soil, acid deposition, forestry techniques, stream quality, and more. Twice we visited the Fernow Experimental Forest in Parsons, WV, once for a day trip and once an overnight camping trip (yes, camping, 8-months pregnant). The students blended their new knowledge and their forest experiences with reflection and wrote very successful personal essays. I’m so proud of them. Class ended last week, and I’m already looking forward to teaching it again next summer.

In short, this spring and summer have been busy, birdy, and a lot of fun. I hiked, I birded, I cut up a lot of dead rodents, I hugged a lot of trees, and I laughed often. And along the way I grew a new human. I wonder how developing during such nature-filled seasons will impact her life? She’s still growing in there, but she’s rapidly running out of room. Her due date is a week from today—August 22. She could make her appearance any minute now. (Hear that, baby? Any…minute…now…)

And now I return to skimming the AOU species checklist for possible baby names… Suggestions welcomed!

I’m a Birds & Beans Coffee “Voice for the Birds”

Friends, if you enjoy coffee, I highly recommend Birds & Beans. They offer several varieties — a Viennese roast, breakfast roast, dark roast, and a decaf — and all of it is triple-certified! In addition to being USDA Organic and Fair Trade, Birds & Beans Coffee is certified “Bird Friendly” by the Smithsonian Migratory Bird Center. This means that the coffee is grown in the shade of canopy trees that provide food and shelter for birds. Many of “our” birds that spend the winters in the tropics have been known to forage in trees above coffee shrubs — birds like the orioles, thrushes, tanagers, and warblers, including my pal the cerulean warbler.

So check out Birds & Beans — and check out my new “Voices” page!